Feb.24,2008
A Journey through Cancer
By Muffet Dolar Villegas
Words
If we live for 70 years we have actually spent quite a lot of time talking. They say that women are capable of more or less 25 thousand words a day, and men are about half of that. Maybe that’s the reason why men fall asleep while women are still half way of the conversation.
The most eloquent words I have heard being said about someone are when I attend a funeral. But it is sad that the recipient of these heartwarming words is now lying deaf and cold.
Cancer taught me that life is too short to hold back appreciation to people who deserve it.
All of us need words that nourish our hearts and actions that speak our good intentions. Words are free. We don’t have to worry about our bank accounts if we say kind or encouraging words to others. It doesn’t cost anything to make a person feel important. We will not miss an inch in height if we tell a person that she or he did a good job. Our salaries will not be deducted if we praise our coworkers. Our house helpers need sincere praise as much as we are. We won’t appear less attractive if we boost others’ self confidence. We don’t become less a parent if we tell our children that they are great.
My mother, like most mothers was always full of praise for her children. But inspite of that, I grew up believing that I was an ugly duckling. Other children used to tease me and call me “Tikling” a Philippine heron which is tall, thin and has very long legs. I was tall for an average Filipino and too thin. Half of my life, I always heard these words, “You should eat well, you’re too thin.”
I would stand last in line all the time in school, and sit at the last row not wanting to be seen. I knew how it was to be different and unattractive, so at a young age I created my own world of painting beautiful, perfect women which turned into gory images of headless mermaids during my adolescent years. Everyday, I would write stories and illustrate comic strips where my heroes and villains were my classmates and teachers.
The world can be cruel and unkind, but we can make a difference in our own little ways. Our solitude can drive us to enlarge our imagination. Other people’s indifference can make us understand our own kind.
Did God make a mistake? Certainly not. We are perfect for His purpose. Even if we feel like an outcast, unimportant, we are very special in His sight. We can yield or fight or blame our parents for not having good genes, but our self worth is not measured by our looks, nor our past and insecurities, but by how we are in God’s sight. He sees a masterpiece in the making not the unfinished work of art.
Words are weapons that make or break us. Be grateful if one learns to appreciate your gifts, but don’t think that you are less of a person if no one does. Continue to affirm the positive qualities of others who need it because as you encourage others, you too are encouraged.
Our nation will be a better place to live if people learn to use words to affirm good positive traits of each other on a daily basis. It creates a positive atmosphere, where progressive ideas grow.
Summer at Tambobo Bay
oil on canvas
Watercolors
$2.00 (handpainted notecards)
Monday, May 12, 2008
PROBLEM OF THE HEART
Feb.17,2008
A Journey Through Cancer
By Muffet Dolar Villegas
The heart of the problem
is the problem of the heart.
I have seen a lot of hearts lately this February. From red throw pillows to boxes of chocolate, greeting cards and red roses with heart shaped objects around them to express love and affection. Hearts are everywhere. It reminds me to search my own heart. There are things that I didn’t like to see. A big SELF is written in big bold letters.
Do you sometimes search your heart? If you are alone, sipping a cup of tea or coffee, a newspaper in your hand, do you take time to see what is going on inside your heart, even as you scan these pages?
The heart is only about the size of a fist. It weighs between 250 to 350 grams or less than a pound. But its size and weight belie its amazing strength and endurance. It beats ceaselessly at an average rate of 72 to 80 per minute if you are a female and 64 to 72 beats per minute if you are a male. A fetus heart beats even faster, 140 to 160 per minute. Its shape is like a popular valentines image.
The heart with its team mates of miles of blood vessels throughout the body, works tirelessly to take in nutrients and oxygen and excrete wastes night and day.
Its job is so crucial that God enclosed the heart in a double walled sac called pericardium. This is made of tough dense connective tissue layer which protects the heart, anchors it to surrounding vital structures and it also prevents overfilling of the heart with blood.
If the heart skips a beat, we realize how much we depend on this organ every second of our existence.
The heart is the center of debates and arguments for many centuries. The ancient Greeks believe that it is the throne of intelligence. Most of us think that it is the source of emotions. Yet the heart is more complicated than these.
As much as the heart is the center of life which pulsates within us, it also plays a vital role in what kind of life we live. Events and circumstances which are happening in the world today are much influenced by the condition of the heart. We can fill it with goodness which can protect the weak or with evil intent to harm, deceive or sow chaos.
Most of the world’s problems today come from the condition of the heart. They say that a nation’s destiny is determined by its leaders. But can the leader change people’s hearts? Aren’t we responsible for our own state of hearts?
David wrote in Psalms 139:23-24Search me O God and know my heart;test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.
If there is an instrument that can measure the colors of the heart, what colors do you think would depict jealousy, discontentment, greed, selfishness, pride, kindness, humility, mercy, understanding or love?
God made our hearts so wonderfully. Only He can change what He has made. Again it’s a choice. He is too gentle and polite to force entry. But He is always willing if you like.
A Journey Through Cancer
By Muffet Dolar Villegas
The heart of the problem
is the problem of the heart.
I have seen a lot of hearts lately this February. From red throw pillows to boxes of chocolate, greeting cards and red roses with heart shaped objects around them to express love and affection. Hearts are everywhere. It reminds me to search my own heart. There are things that I didn’t like to see. A big SELF is written in big bold letters.
Do you sometimes search your heart? If you are alone, sipping a cup of tea or coffee, a newspaper in your hand, do you take time to see what is going on inside your heart, even as you scan these pages?
The heart is only about the size of a fist. It weighs between 250 to 350 grams or less than a pound. But its size and weight belie its amazing strength and endurance. It beats ceaselessly at an average rate of 72 to 80 per minute if you are a female and 64 to 72 beats per minute if you are a male. A fetus heart beats even faster, 140 to 160 per minute. Its shape is like a popular valentines image.
The heart with its team mates of miles of blood vessels throughout the body, works tirelessly to take in nutrients and oxygen and excrete wastes night and day.
Its job is so crucial that God enclosed the heart in a double walled sac called pericardium. This is made of tough dense connective tissue layer which protects the heart, anchors it to surrounding vital structures and it also prevents overfilling of the heart with blood.
If the heart skips a beat, we realize how much we depend on this organ every second of our existence.
The heart is the center of debates and arguments for many centuries. The ancient Greeks believe that it is the throne of intelligence. Most of us think that it is the source of emotions. Yet the heart is more complicated than these.
As much as the heart is the center of life which pulsates within us, it also plays a vital role in what kind of life we live. Events and circumstances which are happening in the world today are much influenced by the condition of the heart. We can fill it with goodness which can protect the weak or with evil intent to harm, deceive or sow chaos.
Most of the world’s problems today come from the condition of the heart. They say that a nation’s destiny is determined by its leaders. But can the leader change people’s hearts? Aren’t we responsible for our own state of hearts?
David wrote in Psalms 139:23-24Search me O God and know my heart;test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.
If there is an instrument that can measure the colors of the heart, what colors do you think would depict jealousy, discontentment, greed, selfishness, pride, kindness, humility, mercy, understanding or love?
God made our hearts so wonderfully. Only He can change what He has made. Again it’s a choice. He is too gentle and polite to force entry. But He is always willing if you like.
Sunday, May 11, 2008
Thorns
Thorns and Roses
Don’t complain about thorns among roses;
Be grateful for roses among thorns.
--Joanie Yoder
I’m painting a bunch of pink roses for my amiable student nurses who took care of me during and after surgery when I noticed I forgot to include the thorns. They don’t look real if I missed the thorns.
Can we just have the roses without the thorns, please? Yet even on Valentines day, we receive roses complete with thorns. We often overlook the thorns and admire the flowers, and the loving thought behind those flowers are more important to us than the gift itself.
But in life we wish that it is a bed of roses. That it is made of soft petals, velvety touch in bright or pastel colors. Unfortunately, life’s journey can be full of thistles, sometimes. We often pray to spare us from the storm, to hide us from the lashing waves. After the onslaught, we wonder how we survived. God’s grace is sufficient and He is never early nor too late.
We get hurt, and most often the scars never go away. They remind us to be humble, that we are not made of gold but our Maker fashioned us from clay. We are far from perfect, yet we are a work in progress. The master Potter sees the finished masterpiece not the crude unfinished lump of clay. He doesn’t give up, until we become a sturdy, shiny vessel whom He can use for His purpose.
My friend from across the globe who has a husband with cancer wrote to me recently, that she had just received bad news about his condition. But she doesn’t lose hope that he will be well someday. She wants to be strong for him, and stay with him through thick and thin. Sharon is an admirable godly woman whose faith can move mountains. She gets up daily and do the best she can and for the things that are too hard to accomplish, she leaves it to God.
We are like teabags. We only know what we are made of if we are put inside a cup of boiling water. It’s hot, but the temperature brings out our real colors. Someone wrote that the real character of the person can be measured not in success but how he handles failures.
When storms hit us, we can either throw in the towel and quit or stand up and finish the race. No one is a born loser. Not until we choose to be one. Everyone has his own gift from God. It may take time to nurture it but the hardest part is FINDING those gifts which have been there within us for many years, and BELIEVING that we can actually use them.
Roses are beautiful but the thorns are part of the package. The most successful person is the one who knows how to live both in good and bad times.
Flowers grow after the rain, and trials produce perseverance. Gratefulness is a virtue that never runs out.
Don’t complain about thorns among roses;
Be grateful for roses among thorns.
--Joanie Yoder
I’m painting a bunch of pink roses for my amiable student nurses who took care of me during and after surgery when I noticed I forgot to include the thorns. They don’t look real if I missed the thorns.
Can we just have the roses without the thorns, please? Yet even on Valentines day, we receive roses complete with thorns. We often overlook the thorns and admire the flowers, and the loving thought behind those flowers are more important to us than the gift itself.
But in life we wish that it is a bed of roses. That it is made of soft petals, velvety touch in bright or pastel colors. Unfortunately, life’s journey can be full of thistles, sometimes. We often pray to spare us from the storm, to hide us from the lashing waves. After the onslaught, we wonder how we survived. God’s grace is sufficient and He is never early nor too late.
We get hurt, and most often the scars never go away. They remind us to be humble, that we are not made of gold but our Maker fashioned us from clay. We are far from perfect, yet we are a work in progress. The master Potter sees the finished masterpiece not the crude unfinished lump of clay. He doesn’t give up, until we become a sturdy, shiny vessel whom He can use for His purpose.
My friend from across the globe who has a husband with cancer wrote to me recently, that she had just received bad news about his condition. But she doesn’t lose hope that he will be well someday. She wants to be strong for him, and stay with him through thick and thin. Sharon is an admirable godly woman whose faith can move mountains. She gets up daily and do the best she can and for the things that are too hard to accomplish, she leaves it to God.
We are like teabags. We only know what we are made of if we are put inside a cup of boiling water. It’s hot, but the temperature brings out our real colors. Someone wrote that the real character of the person can be measured not in success but how he handles failures.
When storms hit us, we can either throw in the towel and quit or stand up and finish the race. No one is a born loser. Not until we choose to be one. Everyone has his own gift from God. It may take time to nurture it but the hardest part is FINDING those gifts which have been there within us for many years, and BELIEVING that we can actually use them.
Roses are beautiful but the thorns are part of the package. The most successful person is the one who knows how to live both in good and bad times.
Flowers grow after the rain, and trials produce perseverance. Gratefulness is a virtue that never runs out.
Wednesday, May 7, 2008
ARE YOU AFRAID?
January 27,2008
A Journey
A Journey through Cancer
By Muffet Dolar Villegas
FEAR
I sought the Lord and He answered me;
He delivered me from all my fears.
Psalm 34:4
(Dateline) CEBU
My name was called out and I was given a piece of paper bearing my medical result. Chills ran through my spine as I looked at the five little red dots which seemed to leap out of the pages of the white paper. “God, no… this is almost as many as I had three years ago.” I concentrated on the dots and I can’t hold back the tears. Solid nodules…enlarged lymph nodes… so they’re back. These dots conjured images of the operating room, the chemo room, hairless months, and I could almost smell the chemo drugs again. It was like a dejavu. Three years ago, this was the day and this month of January, when I knew I had breast cancer.
My husband was reading through my result and he put his arms around me protectively and whispered,“Everything will be alright. God will never leave us alone. These are not final results yet. He can reverse anything.”
I turned to God and groaned. Lord, I know the radiologist said it looks bad, but I didn’t know this will be so bad. Yes, this is me, Lord. The one who wrote about courage, hope, faith, and trust in you. The one you taught how to be strong for three years, but look, I am scared as a mouse today.
When I gave the paper to the secretary of my oncologist, she said, “I’m sorry ma’m, but this is not your result. This paper has another name on it, not yours.”
I was shocked and relieved, but felt sad for the owner of that paper. When my real result was given, it showed only one red dot, with rough edges, which is not a good sign either, and it has to be removed right away. But by this time, fear was replaced by peace. I only have to read the inscription in my bracelet given by a missionary and friend, Janelle Stihl last week which quotes Psalm 27:1 “ The Lord is my light and my salvation- whom shall I fear?”.
Fear can paralyze us and block us away from our intimacy with God. Once we are locked away by fear, we are no longer a threat.
How do we fight fear? Nip it in the bud. We can claim God’s faithfulness in the past and present and praise Him for it. Worship kills depression. It sends all the little torturers of the mind and flesh scampering away and hide back in the darkness.
I looked back at all those times when God was faithful. This will be my third surgery in three years time since cancer. I almost died on the second time when all veins but one collapsed for loss of blood. He took care of me through hairless months of chemotherapy. He took charge of our finances and He took care of my husband and children. He reached out to me through people like you. You took time to read my thoughts in this column, and wrote me inspiring emails.
For these past nights, and even during the day, fear peeps inside and draw the curtains away. It smiles wickedly and asks me, “What if your God is too busy for you?”
I shot back and say, “No, he is not busy, he has even time for you.”
I will know the result whether the nodule is malignant or benign after the surgery on Tuesday. My result is in His hands. Its hard to see beyond His will but He has shown me mercy and care for the past three difficult but best years of my life. May His will be done, not mine.
A Journey
A Journey through Cancer
By Muffet Dolar Villegas
FEAR
I sought the Lord and He answered me;
He delivered me from all my fears.
Psalm 34:4
(Dateline) CEBU
My name was called out and I was given a piece of paper bearing my medical result. Chills ran through my spine as I looked at the five little red dots which seemed to leap out of the pages of the white paper. “God, no… this is almost as many as I had three years ago.” I concentrated on the dots and I can’t hold back the tears. Solid nodules…enlarged lymph nodes… so they’re back. These dots conjured images of the operating room, the chemo room, hairless months, and I could almost smell the chemo drugs again. It was like a dejavu. Three years ago, this was the day and this month of January, when I knew I had breast cancer.
My husband was reading through my result and he put his arms around me protectively and whispered,“Everything will be alright. God will never leave us alone. These are not final results yet. He can reverse anything.”
I turned to God and groaned. Lord, I know the radiologist said it looks bad, but I didn’t know this will be so bad. Yes, this is me, Lord. The one who wrote about courage, hope, faith, and trust in you. The one you taught how to be strong for three years, but look, I am scared as a mouse today.
When I gave the paper to the secretary of my oncologist, she said, “I’m sorry ma’m, but this is not your result. This paper has another name on it, not yours.”
I was shocked and relieved, but felt sad for the owner of that paper. When my real result was given, it showed only one red dot, with rough edges, which is not a good sign either, and it has to be removed right away. But by this time, fear was replaced by peace. I only have to read the inscription in my bracelet given by a missionary and friend, Janelle Stihl last week which quotes Psalm 27:1 “ The Lord is my light and my salvation- whom shall I fear?”.
Fear can paralyze us and block us away from our intimacy with God. Once we are locked away by fear, we are no longer a threat.
How do we fight fear? Nip it in the bud. We can claim God’s faithfulness in the past and present and praise Him for it. Worship kills depression. It sends all the little torturers of the mind and flesh scampering away and hide back in the darkness.
I looked back at all those times when God was faithful. This will be my third surgery in three years time since cancer. I almost died on the second time when all veins but one collapsed for loss of blood. He took care of me through hairless months of chemotherapy. He took charge of our finances and He took care of my husband and children. He reached out to me through people like you. You took time to read my thoughts in this column, and wrote me inspiring emails.
For these past nights, and even during the day, fear peeps inside and draw the curtains away. It smiles wickedly and asks me, “What if your God is too busy for you?”
I shot back and say, “No, he is not busy, he has even time for you.”
I will know the result whether the nodule is malignant or benign after the surgery on Tuesday. My result is in His hands. Its hard to see beyond His will but He has shown me mercy and care for the past three difficult but best years of my life. May His will be done, not mine.
THE HANDS WITH A HEART
January 20,2008
A Journey through Cancer
By Muffet Dolar Villegas
Heart of Gold
Beloved,let us love one another,
for love is of God.-1 John 4:7
I can enumerate endless events which happened lately, but I want to highlight on an inspiring couple.
When we pass through life like a zooming jet, we only leave a faint impression of a fading, disappearing smoke. But once in a while, we are reminded to stop and breath, stop and listen, stop and know. Like a delicious soup prepared before us in a cold stormy night, we pause, take in the aroma and close our eyes, then sip and just linger a little bit. I have this precious quiet moment now.
I have so many things to share with you that ideas burst in my head and I don’t know where to start. There were days that I stare blankly at an empty screen for hours, but today is different.
Actually, I’m sick again today, and I am taking a delicious time to rest and ponder on God’s awesome blessings. My kind doctor, Ami Madamba, my children’s pediatrician and a good friend advised me to have a vaccine for protection from any forms of bacteria. I have been an easy target of infection these days, but when our bodies are weak, our spirit seems to go to higher places. This time also serves as my reflection time.
There will be exciting school activities with our Korean students visitors next week, like press conferences which I will handle, and my medical examinations where feelings can be very persuasive like doubts, courage, fear and hope.
But I know that when time comes, God knows how to make just the right mixture, and everything will turn out best.
God added into my list of friends a wonderful couple from England, Noel and Tess Clarke who emailed me and expressed their desire to share their time and abilities to help children with cancer here in Dumaguete city. I was emotional while reading through the email, and the earnest desire to help brought me much hope and courage for others in this journey. I know there are many out there who work quietly, tirelessly to make this world a better place to live. Noel and Tess have devoted their lives in helping other people cope with some debilitating illnesses in England for many years. Noel said that he was encouraged to email me when he read my November article about cancer month. In that issue, I wrote about some of the activities which other medical doctors initiated to help their patients, which was headed by Dr. Geena Macalua, Dr. Jing Rosario and Dr. Sheila Flores of the Silliman University Medical Center.
Tess, is a Filipina, who is also an artist and has a big heart for children. She donated some art materials to my oncologist Dr. Macalua to be used for free art therapy lessons to help cancer warriors.
I write about these people who have willing hearts and hands to help, because I want to encourage others without hope, those who are told that life ends soon and those who feel like they are singled out from all the rest to suffer alone. I would like to let them know that God reaches out His hands, and uses people who make themselves available for the task.
And for those who would like to help cancer warriors, you may approach Dr. Jing Rosario or Dr. Geena Macalua of the the Silliman Medical Center.
Time and distance do not seem to matter to people who have the heart for people. The most beautiful hands are not the smooth ones, but those which bear the mark of their hearts.
A Journey through Cancer
By Muffet Dolar Villegas
Heart of Gold
Beloved,let us love one another,
for love is of God.-1 John 4:7
I can enumerate endless events which happened lately, but I want to highlight on an inspiring couple.
When we pass through life like a zooming jet, we only leave a faint impression of a fading, disappearing smoke. But once in a while, we are reminded to stop and breath, stop and listen, stop and know. Like a delicious soup prepared before us in a cold stormy night, we pause, take in the aroma and close our eyes, then sip and just linger a little bit. I have this precious quiet moment now.
I have so many things to share with you that ideas burst in my head and I don’t know where to start. There were days that I stare blankly at an empty screen for hours, but today is different.
Actually, I’m sick again today, and I am taking a delicious time to rest and ponder on God’s awesome blessings. My kind doctor, Ami Madamba, my children’s pediatrician and a good friend advised me to have a vaccine for protection from any forms of bacteria. I have been an easy target of infection these days, but when our bodies are weak, our spirit seems to go to higher places. This time also serves as my reflection time.
There will be exciting school activities with our Korean students visitors next week, like press conferences which I will handle, and my medical examinations where feelings can be very persuasive like doubts, courage, fear and hope.
But I know that when time comes, God knows how to make just the right mixture, and everything will turn out best.
God added into my list of friends a wonderful couple from England, Noel and Tess Clarke who emailed me and expressed their desire to share their time and abilities to help children with cancer here in Dumaguete city. I was emotional while reading through the email, and the earnest desire to help brought me much hope and courage for others in this journey. I know there are many out there who work quietly, tirelessly to make this world a better place to live. Noel and Tess have devoted their lives in helping other people cope with some debilitating illnesses in England for many years. Noel said that he was encouraged to email me when he read my November article about cancer month. In that issue, I wrote about some of the activities which other medical doctors initiated to help their patients, which was headed by Dr. Geena Macalua, Dr. Jing Rosario and Dr. Sheila Flores of the Silliman University Medical Center.
Tess, is a Filipina, who is also an artist and has a big heart for children. She donated some art materials to my oncologist Dr. Macalua to be used for free art therapy lessons to help cancer warriors.
I write about these people who have willing hearts and hands to help, because I want to encourage others without hope, those who are told that life ends soon and those who feel like they are singled out from all the rest to suffer alone. I would like to let them know that God reaches out His hands, and uses people who make themselves available for the task.
And for those who would like to help cancer warriors, you may approach Dr. Jing Rosario or Dr. Geena Macalua of the the Silliman Medical Center.
Time and distance do not seem to matter to people who have the heart for people. The most beautiful hands are not the smooth ones, but those which bear the mark of their hearts.
A CLOUDY DAY
A Journey
January 13,2008
A Journey Through Cancer
By Muffet Dolar Villegas
The Battle Goes On
It is a cloudy day at the beach, and the pictures I take show no excitement, the colors are drab. The sea reflects the gray skies. But as the sun comes out and the rays find its right places, shadows emerge and the ordinary bangka (canoe) transforms into a beautiful lighted vessel against the backdrop of blue green waters and gleaming sand.
My two little friends, Miggy and Abby frolic in the beach looking for hermit crabs. Miggy is my prayer warrior and Abby is my little model for painting. Their laughter combined with the sound of the waves is life in a nutshell.
The shadows of life is important to superimpose the essence of living. It is not easy to linger in the the shadows, but it makes us appreciate the sunshine. There are ferns that thrives in the shadows and there are plants that explodes in colors only in summer. Both are friends. In one time or another , all of us have passed the shadows and enjoyed the sunshine even more because we knew how it was without it.
In painting, we need the shadows to highlight our focal point. The focus of the subject brings all the emotions that captures the painter and the viewer. The soul of the painting vibrates when we strike the balance of light and dark. All the other objects must play in the shadows to give drama to the main character.
I am three years now since I was diagnosed with breast cancer that was immediately followed by radical mastectomy and chemotherapy. The battle goes on.
Life has changed then. It has become more meaningful, just like today.
Time flies so fast, and without God and your prayers, I won’t be able to survive those valleys of shadows.
The most beautiful part of this journey is touching God through you. The reason behind a person’s strengths, hope, faith, triumphs in life is because someone, somewhere, prayed. I will go through my routine medical tests on the last week of this month, and thank you for the prayers.
When God allows us to walk in the shadow of death, His presence comforts us in spite of fear and pain. His love is magnified when we need it most.
Philip Brookes once said, “Do not pray for easy times. Pray to be stronger men! Do not pray for tasks equal to your powers. Pray for powers equal to your tasks.”
If you have time, please visit my blog to see some of my paintings which I am able to document. www.muffetvillegascancerart.blogspot.com
January 13,2008
A Journey Through Cancer
By Muffet Dolar Villegas
The Battle Goes On
It is a cloudy day at the beach, and the pictures I take show no excitement, the colors are drab. The sea reflects the gray skies. But as the sun comes out and the rays find its right places, shadows emerge and the ordinary bangka (canoe) transforms into a beautiful lighted vessel against the backdrop of blue green waters and gleaming sand.
My two little friends, Miggy and Abby frolic in the beach looking for hermit crabs. Miggy is my prayer warrior and Abby is my little model for painting. Their laughter combined with the sound of the waves is life in a nutshell.
The shadows of life is important to superimpose the essence of living. It is not easy to linger in the the shadows, but it makes us appreciate the sunshine. There are ferns that thrives in the shadows and there are plants that explodes in colors only in summer. Both are friends. In one time or another , all of us have passed the shadows and enjoyed the sunshine even more because we knew how it was without it.
In painting, we need the shadows to highlight our focal point. The focus of the subject brings all the emotions that captures the painter and the viewer. The soul of the painting vibrates when we strike the balance of light and dark. All the other objects must play in the shadows to give drama to the main character.
I am three years now since I was diagnosed with breast cancer that was immediately followed by radical mastectomy and chemotherapy. The battle goes on.
Life has changed then. It has become more meaningful, just like today.
Time flies so fast, and without God and your prayers, I won’t be able to survive those valleys of shadows.
The most beautiful part of this journey is touching God through you. The reason behind a person’s strengths, hope, faith, triumphs in life is because someone, somewhere, prayed. I will go through my routine medical tests on the last week of this month, and thank you for the prayers.
When God allows us to walk in the shadow of death, His presence comforts us in spite of fear and pain. His love is magnified when we need it most.
Philip Brookes once said, “Do not pray for easy times. Pray to be stronger men! Do not pray for tasks equal to your powers. Pray for powers equal to your tasks.”
If you have time, please visit my blog to see some of my paintings which I am able to document. www.muffetvillegascancerart.blogspot.com
2008 IS STILL A BABY
January 9,2008
A Journey through cancer
By Muffet Dolar Villegas
Reflections
Year 2008 is still a baby. She’s only a few days old. Her eyes are expectantly looking around her small cubicle, a few weeks more and she can see the world clearly.
She explores her new found strength, her sounds are coos and aahhhsss. She came out with a heavy big bang, depending on where she was born. Everyone welcomed her with laughter, cheers, good wishes and fireworks. People prepared the most delicious food to usher her in.
Around her, news about the currency getting stronger or weaker does not register well. There is a new rise in world oil prices and commodities maybe affected. She doesn’t care. She’s still young, and there’s so much time to dream and live.
Then one day, she begins to explore the world, and the war which made her predecessors sad is still raging mad. Late at night, tired people come to empty homes with broken hearts. Children are either begging in the streets or they live in broken homes disguised as mansions. People are still dying of loneliness or cancer.
The pursuit for happiness is still as elusive as a dream.
After a long journey and endless visits, she comes home sad and exhausted. “The work is too large and the time is too short. I can never be better than the years before me. I can’t even start.” She sighed mournfully.
But as she’s about to give up, she sees a child coming out of a door. Like her, he has hope in his eyes, his feet has wings. She was like him before she started out her journey. He turns around and sees her.
“Come,” he says, “I will show you the rainbows.” And he takes her by the hand and brings her to the same place she had been. But there are no rainbows.
The child detects the frustration in her face and he smiles. “ Look closely. All you see are their tired and unhappy faces. All you hear are their complaints. But look deeper, and you can see a small glimmer in their hearts. Those are the rainbows.”
The year 2008 may not bring a promise of hope and happiness, because she cannot. Each one of us owns that promise. It’s a flicker of faith that lies deep inside our hearts. It cannot die, as long as we hold on and believe.
God did not promise us a world without troubles, but He assures us that He is the spring that we can draw upon our strength and hope.
These sparkling embers can become radiant rays if we all unite in love, understanding, humility, and selflessness to make 2008 much better than the last year.
A Journey through cancer
By Muffet Dolar Villegas
Reflections
Year 2008 is still a baby. She’s only a few days old. Her eyes are expectantly looking around her small cubicle, a few weeks more and she can see the world clearly.
She explores her new found strength, her sounds are coos and aahhhsss. She came out with a heavy big bang, depending on where she was born. Everyone welcomed her with laughter, cheers, good wishes and fireworks. People prepared the most delicious food to usher her in.
Around her, news about the currency getting stronger or weaker does not register well. There is a new rise in world oil prices and commodities maybe affected. She doesn’t care. She’s still young, and there’s so much time to dream and live.
Then one day, she begins to explore the world, and the war which made her predecessors sad is still raging mad. Late at night, tired people come to empty homes with broken hearts. Children are either begging in the streets or they live in broken homes disguised as mansions. People are still dying of loneliness or cancer.
The pursuit for happiness is still as elusive as a dream.
After a long journey and endless visits, she comes home sad and exhausted. “The work is too large and the time is too short. I can never be better than the years before me. I can’t even start.” She sighed mournfully.
But as she’s about to give up, she sees a child coming out of a door. Like her, he has hope in his eyes, his feet has wings. She was like him before she started out her journey. He turns around and sees her.
“Come,” he says, “I will show you the rainbows.” And he takes her by the hand and brings her to the same place she had been. But there are no rainbows.
The child detects the frustration in her face and he smiles. “ Look closely. All you see are their tired and unhappy faces. All you hear are their complaints. But look deeper, and you can see a small glimmer in their hearts. Those are the rainbows.”
The year 2008 may not bring a promise of hope and happiness, because she cannot. Each one of us owns that promise. It’s a flicker of faith that lies deep inside our hearts. It cannot die, as long as we hold on and believe.
God did not promise us a world without troubles, but He assures us that He is the spring that we can draw upon our strength and hope.
These sparkling embers can become radiant rays if we all unite in love, understanding, humility, and selflessness to make 2008 much better than the last year.
MEET MERRY
A Journey Through Cancer
Dec.23,2007
A Journey Through Cancer
By Muffet Dolar Villegas
Meet Merry through Joy
In our pursuit to have a merry Christmas, we get caught into the usual grind of endless activities, shopping rush and parties. Most of us forget the reason for the season, and worse, we end up tired, exhausted and without joy. Are you really merry this Christmas? Are you sure that you will have a happy New year?
The problem with Merry and Happy is that they depend so much on our environment and feelings. But Joy comes like a gentle breeze which brings assurance of an unconditional love and acceptance from God. It defies circumstances and situations. It does not end when life ends, but it goes on and on beyond death.
Christmas is almost over, and there are many things that we want to do within the timeframe which God allows. But we get into the rush of Christmas, and before we know its happening, its all over.
Maybe to some of us Christmas is only a happy holiday, or a time when we can receive beautiful gifts or thirteen month pay and even bonuses. It’s a month to sing Christmas carols to bring joy to many houses but ironically, we stretch their patience when we deprive them of the much needed time to rest and sleep when all they had to do after office hours is to get up and entertain five to ten sets of carolers every night. We can also be selfish in thinking that others have to cater to our needs instead of us giving out a helping hand. But really, what is Christmas all about?
When we are reminded of the real meaning of Christmas during programs, we turn a cold cheek and tell ourselves, here we go again, I knew that story since I was a child. It’s all about a baby wrapped in swaddling clothes, was born in a manger, with Joseph and Mary who were denied in every home they went because there was no room left for them to stay.
But we like the part where the three wise men gave Jesus wonderful gifts, because at least that justifies our gift giving.
So let us not miss the most precious gift of Salvation that is offered to all mankind, which is the focal point of every Christmas celebration. In John 3:16, it says, "For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.” You may go back and read it again. No, this time, slowly, and understand each word. If we take time and really think about this wonderful truth, is there any reason for us not to be joyful? Do you have joy right now as you read? Or your mind goes back to the thirteenth month pay with nothing left because of deductions?
You may receive a BMW car this Christmas from your brother, father or a spouse, but the thing is, like other material things they are perishable, and when you get used to the feeling of being happy, it wanes and becomes empty. The BMW becomes nice again if someone noticed it as brand new. A diamond ring may last forever here on earth but you can never take it with you when you die. All the precious and not so expensive things that we give to those whom we care about are just a tiny fraction of what is given to us for free which is Salvation, through the babe in a manger.
This kind of joy that Jesus gives does not depend on circumstances. This is the joy which brings inner peace amidst poverty, loneliness in sickness and pain or even at the point of death. We can only have a Merry Christmas and a Happy new year despite of anything that we go through if we have that kind of joy in our hearts.
Dec.23,2007
A Journey Through Cancer
By Muffet Dolar Villegas
Meet Merry through Joy
In our pursuit to have a merry Christmas, we get caught into the usual grind of endless activities, shopping rush and parties. Most of us forget the reason for the season, and worse, we end up tired, exhausted and without joy. Are you really merry this Christmas? Are you sure that you will have a happy New year?
The problem with Merry and Happy is that they depend so much on our environment and feelings. But Joy comes like a gentle breeze which brings assurance of an unconditional love and acceptance from God. It defies circumstances and situations. It does not end when life ends, but it goes on and on beyond death.
Christmas is almost over, and there are many things that we want to do within the timeframe which God allows. But we get into the rush of Christmas, and before we know its happening, its all over.
Maybe to some of us Christmas is only a happy holiday, or a time when we can receive beautiful gifts or thirteen month pay and even bonuses. It’s a month to sing Christmas carols to bring joy to many houses but ironically, we stretch their patience when we deprive them of the much needed time to rest and sleep when all they had to do after office hours is to get up and entertain five to ten sets of carolers every night. We can also be selfish in thinking that others have to cater to our needs instead of us giving out a helping hand. But really, what is Christmas all about?
When we are reminded of the real meaning of Christmas during programs, we turn a cold cheek and tell ourselves, here we go again, I knew that story since I was a child. It’s all about a baby wrapped in swaddling clothes, was born in a manger, with Joseph and Mary who were denied in every home they went because there was no room left for them to stay.
But we like the part where the three wise men gave Jesus wonderful gifts, because at least that justifies our gift giving.
So let us not miss the most precious gift of Salvation that is offered to all mankind, which is the focal point of every Christmas celebration. In John 3:16, it says, "For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.” You may go back and read it again. No, this time, slowly, and understand each word. If we take time and really think about this wonderful truth, is there any reason for us not to be joyful? Do you have joy right now as you read? Or your mind goes back to the thirteenth month pay with nothing left because of deductions?
You may receive a BMW car this Christmas from your brother, father or a spouse, but the thing is, like other material things they are perishable, and when you get used to the feeling of being happy, it wanes and becomes empty. The BMW becomes nice again if someone noticed it as brand new. A diamond ring may last forever here on earth but you can never take it with you when you die. All the precious and not so expensive things that we give to those whom we care about are just a tiny fraction of what is given to us for free which is Salvation, through the babe in a manger.
This kind of joy that Jesus gives does not depend on circumstances. This is the joy which brings inner peace amidst poverty, loneliness in sickness and pain or even at the point of death. We can only have a Merry Christmas and a Happy new year despite of anything that we go through if we have that kind of joy in our hearts.
A TOUCH CAN HEAL
My Journey
Nov.18,2007
My Journey with Cancer
By Muffet Dolar Villegas
The Healing Touch
I receive a hug very often. Even if they say that patients under chemotherapy should not mingle with a lot of people or stay away from a crowd because we might catch a virus due to very low immune system during the treatment, yet I am happy when someone hugs me.
Is there any connection with touch and healing? In the holy scriptures, Jesus healed many through a command, but some he reached out and touched them, like the leper. He was crying “unclean! Unclean!” so that people will go away from him, but Jesus touched him, and he was healed. Jesus touch meant a lot. It spelled acceptance and love from someone who is the source of hope and love.
Harold Sala wrote in his book Just for Today that a family counselor said that most unwanted pregnancies could have been prevented if a father only hugged his teenage daughter everyday. A hug is a manifestation of love. It can be a fatherly love, motherly, sisterly, brotherly, or plain friendly love.
People respond to a touch. The pain seems to go away when touched by a loving hand or a kind embrace.
Some of us are not so demonstrative when showing that we care. We are molded by the way we were brought up. If we grew up with not so demonstrative parents, we also act the same way as we were treated, but of course with some exceptions.
Our culture also says a lot about our behaviour. Some cultures encourage people to demonstrate a friendly embrace, while others are not permitted even to hold a hand because it connotes another meaning.
But even a pat at the back means something for someone who needs encouragement. A simple handshake says one is pleased to meet you. A hug means it is good to see you or mano po with children kissing the hands of the elderly in a Flipino culture is a sign of deep respect.
I received a lot of hugs lately from women who asked me to speak about the spiritual side of this journey. My family is always demonstrative of their love for me but now I get twice the amount of hugs from them everyday.
A touch like faith in God, can heal.
Nov.18,2007
My Journey with Cancer
By Muffet Dolar Villegas
The Healing Touch
I receive a hug very often. Even if they say that patients under chemotherapy should not mingle with a lot of people or stay away from a crowd because we might catch a virus due to very low immune system during the treatment, yet I am happy when someone hugs me.
Is there any connection with touch and healing? In the holy scriptures, Jesus healed many through a command, but some he reached out and touched them, like the leper. He was crying “unclean! Unclean!” so that people will go away from him, but Jesus touched him, and he was healed. Jesus touch meant a lot. It spelled acceptance and love from someone who is the source of hope and love.
Harold Sala wrote in his book Just for Today that a family counselor said that most unwanted pregnancies could have been prevented if a father only hugged his teenage daughter everyday. A hug is a manifestation of love. It can be a fatherly love, motherly, sisterly, brotherly, or plain friendly love.
People respond to a touch. The pain seems to go away when touched by a loving hand or a kind embrace.
Some of us are not so demonstrative when showing that we care. We are molded by the way we were brought up. If we grew up with not so demonstrative parents, we also act the same way as we were treated, but of course with some exceptions.
Our culture also says a lot about our behaviour. Some cultures encourage people to demonstrate a friendly embrace, while others are not permitted even to hold a hand because it connotes another meaning.
But even a pat at the back means something for someone who needs encouragement. A simple handshake says one is pleased to meet you. A hug means it is good to see you or mano po with children kissing the hands of the elderly in a Flipino culture is a sign of deep respect.
I received a lot of hugs lately from women who asked me to speak about the spiritual side of this journey. My family is always demonstrative of their love for me but now I get twice the amount of hugs from them everyday.
A touch like faith in God, can heal.
NOVEMBER IS CANCER MONTH
My journey
Nov.11,2007
My Journey with Cancer
Muffet Dolar Villegas
CANCER MONTH
November is a cancer awareness month. The Silliman University Medical Center Foundation commemorates this event with various activities for this month. It started during the midweek service which was held last week at the SUMC which was attended by medical practitioners and cancer patients who still undergo treatment, survivors , and supportive family members. Some of those who were present have encountered cancer through their loved ones who passed away battling the disease. The theme was Living with Cancer.
“Most of us are living with cancer in one way or another,” Said Dr. Geena Macalaua, one of my oncologists who has been actively involved in caring for her patients, not only as a physician, but who goes out of her way in organizing activities that can help her patients.
She stressed that we are part of it as caregivers, those who are in medical professions, relatives and friends of the patients and those who are having been diagnosed with the disease themselves.
Fighting cancer is part our battle to survive in the twenty first century. We have adopted a kind of lifestyle that has dramatically changed from our predecessor centuries ago.
What is a day like to you? Do you wake up early in the morning, grab a cup of coffee, and beat the traffic? Since we are living here in Dumaguete city, the traffic is not as time consuming as you live in other cities like Manila, where you spend half of your lifetime on the road as you commute to work everyday. At noontime, we squeezed in some hurried lunch, at some fast food counter and go back to work. After eating dinner at home, we spend more time to earn more money through other means until we drop dead. Let’s all face it. A regular monthly salary in our country cannot even feed the earner, how much more if you have children and they all go to school?
We spend less time in exercise, because walking an extra mile will cut our time from generating another income, sitting in front of the computer to generate extra money, or baking cakes or prepare ice candies to sell tomorrow for another precious bucks at least for transportation fares.
Our children lead the same lifestyle. We force them to wake up early in the morning, grab the same food we eat, which is often saturated with fat and preservatives( the fastest way to prepare for working moms, which our kids love too.) but sometimes, due to pressure, they can hardly eat, so we pack their lunches for school, eat a hurried lunch then go back to class and eat and drink more junkfoods in between.
We don’t want them to be absent or to be late. They have to accomplish well, regardless if their stomachs are empty. Study, study, then work and work, until one day we discover a lump somewhere or something wrong with our blood chemistry.
How much pressure and abuse can our bodies take before it screams for a STOP? How long can little children take activities after activities and stress before we discover its too late?
Cancer strikes not only the middle aged ones but children and young adults too. It waits for the right combination of stress, nutritional deficiencies that weaken the immune system before it shows up. Latest study from John Hopkins says that every person has cancer cells in the body. These cancer cells cannot be detected by standard tests until they have multiplied into a few billions. It revealed that cancer cell occur between 6 to more than ten times in a person’s lifetime.
I stopped nagging at my son everytime he can’t get up early for school since I was diagnosed with cancer. I saw many children with cancer during my treatment at the hospitals and I was confronted with priorities in life. I’m not saying that we should not urge them to the best in school, but I would rather see my son alive than lose him to cancer. Others may call it paranoia, but I live with the reality.
We are caught in the web of many celebrations. We measure our accomplishment with many events and activities. We push our limits or we drive others to it. Our crazy world tells us that you are a loser if you can’t reach its standard. The mass media is telling us how to be cool by the world’s standards. But the bottom line is our health, and the quality of life we lead. Life is a gift from God, just like salvation. But like a gift, you are free to accept or reject it.
Nov.11,2007
My Journey with Cancer
Muffet Dolar Villegas
CANCER MONTH
November is a cancer awareness month. The Silliman University Medical Center Foundation commemorates this event with various activities for this month. It started during the midweek service which was held last week at the SUMC which was attended by medical practitioners and cancer patients who still undergo treatment, survivors , and supportive family members. Some of those who were present have encountered cancer through their loved ones who passed away battling the disease. The theme was Living with Cancer.
“Most of us are living with cancer in one way or another,” Said Dr. Geena Macalaua, one of my oncologists who has been actively involved in caring for her patients, not only as a physician, but who goes out of her way in organizing activities that can help her patients.
She stressed that we are part of it as caregivers, those who are in medical professions, relatives and friends of the patients and those who are having been diagnosed with the disease themselves.
Fighting cancer is part our battle to survive in the twenty first century. We have adopted a kind of lifestyle that has dramatically changed from our predecessor centuries ago.
What is a day like to you? Do you wake up early in the morning, grab a cup of coffee, and beat the traffic? Since we are living here in Dumaguete city, the traffic is not as time consuming as you live in other cities like Manila, where you spend half of your lifetime on the road as you commute to work everyday. At noontime, we squeezed in some hurried lunch, at some fast food counter and go back to work. After eating dinner at home, we spend more time to earn more money through other means until we drop dead. Let’s all face it. A regular monthly salary in our country cannot even feed the earner, how much more if you have children and they all go to school?
We spend less time in exercise, because walking an extra mile will cut our time from generating another income, sitting in front of the computer to generate extra money, or baking cakes or prepare ice candies to sell tomorrow for another precious bucks at least for transportation fares.
Our children lead the same lifestyle. We force them to wake up early in the morning, grab the same food we eat, which is often saturated with fat and preservatives( the fastest way to prepare for working moms, which our kids love too.) but sometimes, due to pressure, they can hardly eat, so we pack their lunches for school, eat a hurried lunch then go back to class and eat and drink more junkfoods in between.
We don’t want them to be absent or to be late. They have to accomplish well, regardless if their stomachs are empty. Study, study, then work and work, until one day we discover a lump somewhere or something wrong with our blood chemistry.
How much pressure and abuse can our bodies take before it screams for a STOP? How long can little children take activities after activities and stress before we discover its too late?
Cancer strikes not only the middle aged ones but children and young adults too. It waits for the right combination of stress, nutritional deficiencies that weaken the immune system before it shows up. Latest study from John Hopkins says that every person has cancer cells in the body. These cancer cells cannot be detected by standard tests until they have multiplied into a few billions. It revealed that cancer cell occur between 6 to more than ten times in a person’s lifetime.
I stopped nagging at my son everytime he can’t get up early for school since I was diagnosed with cancer. I saw many children with cancer during my treatment at the hospitals and I was confronted with priorities in life. I’m not saying that we should not urge them to the best in school, but I would rather see my son alive than lose him to cancer. Others may call it paranoia, but I live with the reality.
We are caught in the web of many celebrations. We measure our accomplishment with many events and activities. We push our limits or we drive others to it. Our crazy world tells us that you are a loser if you can’t reach its standard. The mass media is telling us how to be cool by the world’s standards. But the bottom line is our health, and the quality of life we lead. Life is a gift from God, just like salvation. But like a gift, you are free to accept or reject it.
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